What Happened to Common Courtesy?

So, this is a message (along with a corresponding friend request) I get earlier today in its entirety on Facebook:

“Someone suggested that I contact you about a book that I am writing. Do you have publishing contacts? I am still finishing the manuscript but wanted to start working on the business side as well.”

That’s it. No “Hi Jon.” No “Please.” No “thank you” (or even “thanks”) No opening greeting, no sense of polite attitude, no sense of gratitude for any help I might be inclined to provide in the future. Nothing. Now, I happen to know this individual, but not anywhere on a level I would equate with that of a close friend (where such an abrupt note might be forgivable). He’s an associate. Thus, the need for common courtesy is even more necessary. But there’s nothing. Just more of an expectation that I would drop everything in my life right now in order to respond to what is basically a note devoid of politeness.

So, what are the odds I’m going to help this individual?


There’s nothing I hate more than people who can’t even be bothered to use two phrases that should be ingrained in all of us from birth: please & thank you. Further, I’m not going to contribute to what I see as the decline of basic decorum by responding to this. You want my attention? You want my help? Then approach me properly. Mind your manners.

Jeez Louise.

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  • mystiquetur January 29, 2010  

    I agree 100% with how you are handling this. I am sorry that someone was so rude. Manners are a must in my household.. I fear a lot of homes are lacking it.

  • Tracy January 29, 2010  

    I notice that all the time in emails from other people, whether they are sending me an email or replying to my email to them. No greeting or how am I doing. Then they don’t even close with a regards, sincerely, see ya later, thanks, etc…

  • Merle January 29, 2010  

    You SHOULD reply…..with a simple “nope” lol.

  • Matt S January 29, 2010  

    It’s also amazing that Facebook was the first thing that came to this person’s mind. Why not, say, find your website and send you an email? Of course, then there is a more apparent need for a salutation of some sort, which would likely say, “Hey John”. Then “misspelled name” can be added to the list of offenses.

  • Madelon January 30, 2010  

    Just because email is easy, doesn’t mean it has to be rude. Your post is right on target. I wouldn’t help either.

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