9 Tips for Would-Be Warriors

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I write a lot of these posts for my sons – that’s the simple truth of this blog. Especially when it comes to martial arts and various other unorthodox subject matter. The thing I love about the Internet is that posts like these will – barring some catastrophic event – be around for years after I am worm food. And so I write these posts with them in mind. Here is another.

You’ll meet a lot of people who talk about being a warrior. It’s a term they’ll bandy about and use to describe themselves. In some cases, it will be appropriate. In others, not so much. Some people who use the term “warrior” are really nothing but bullies or wanna-be tough guys. The true warriors possess many similar characteristics and if you want to follow the path of a warrior, you’ll need to incorporate these into your life. Otherwise, you won’t be a warrior as much as a joke.

1. Never Stop Learning – This is critical to your personal evolution. The moment you think “I’ve got this,” is the exact moment you stop evolving. A true warrior never thinks they know it all, because they don’t. A true warrior understands that the lessons in life are constant and continuous, although they may not look like lessons at first. You are never beyond learning unless you put yourself on some pedestal and believe that you know it all. You don’t reach a point or an age or a number of years of experience and then get to say, “I’m a master.” True warriors aspire to mastery, but know they will never reach it in one lifetime. The aspiration and pursuit of mastery are more important than reaching it.

2. Always Train with Someone Better Than You – After a certain number of years, you will inevitably reach a point where you want to test yourself. That’s natural and healthy. In feudal Japan, these were called musha shugyo – or wandering quests. The idea was for the student to take the lessons they’d learned and put them to the test in the real world. So, too, will you aspire to challenge yourself and be tested in the crucible of real world scenarios. And you should. Because all the training in the world is no substitute for real world experience. However, take care that you don’t stray too long from a teacher. Stay away too long and your ego will begin to delude you with thoughts that you have all the knowledge you need; that you are a master now because you have a certain grade or certain experience; that it’s too difficult to get with your teacher for one reason or another. You should always find someone better than you to train with so you keep learning and evolving. If you can’t find anyone better than you, then you are either deluded about your own ability, or you aren’t trying hard enough to find someone better than you. The reality is there is always someone better than you. There is always someone who has trained longer or harder or better than you. Don’t ever believe your own invincibility because the universe will undoubtedly step in and show you just how vulnerable you actually are. That’s not a fun lesson.

3. Your Ego Is Your Best Friend & Your Worst Enemy – Everyone needs ego. It gives us confidence to try new things, to appreciate the skills we have, and to believe in ourselves when no one else does. But ego is also the enabler of delusion. It is the most skilled and subtle opponent you will ever face. It will lead you astray and off the path with insidious little thoughts that will put down the roots of a dandelion before you even see the danger. When you look into the mirror, you must see things as they truly are – not as you wish them to be. The ability of a warrior to discern truth – to know the reality, no matter how potentially unpleasant – from falsehood is one of your most potent weapons and skills. My teacher warned all of his senior students many years ago to guard against the traps that ego puts forth to waylay even the hardiest of souls. It is a tough thing to come to grips with, but comes to grip with it you must. There are too many who espouse lessons without ever following the principles themselves. If you talk the talk, make sure you also walk the walk.

4. Make Sure You Have People Who Are Truthful Around You – As you grow and become skillful, you will attract people of lower rank who idolize you or worship your ability in some way. You are more advanced than they are; you have some skill they wish to have. Because of this, they will become friendly with you. They will do their best to get on your good side or otherwise ingratiate themselves into your inner circle. Perhaps they will whisper gossip into your ear or play upon your suspicions or fears in order to make themselves seem trustworthy, loyal, or an ally. Their motivations may be innocuous or they may be suspect; they may come from friends or even the person closest to your heart. But just as you guard against inner ego, so too must you guard against exterior influences like these. Real friends will call you on your bullshit. They will tell you your crap stinks. Beware of those who only bolster your pride, only agree with your proclamations, and regurgitate the things you say to reinforce bad assumptions and mistaken ideas. You may love hearing them say these things; you may love the way it makes you feel, but they are surely leading you even further away from the path, rather than checking you and challenging you when you need it most. Those who truly love you will tell you when you are screwing up just as they will tell you when you are doing a great job. Life is a balance and if you are only seeking positive reinforcement then you are not walking the path of a warrior.

5. Never Stop Challenging Yourself – Real warriors always seek our challenge, no matter if it is in your realm of specialization or not. They are adventurers and pioneers, risk takers and explorers, those who dare and dare all the time. If they are truly committed to the ideal of Tatsujin – a complete human being – then they are always seeking new places to explore, new things to learn, new ways to get better. Beware those “warriors” who talk a good game, but never push their personal boundaries or leave the comfort of their fantasy world.

6. Discomfort is a Sure Sign That You Are Doing Something Right – To go along with #5, if you are uncomfortable in an environment or with a certain new skill, then you are daring to more, aspiring to greater heights, and risking something – even if it is your ego. By putting yourself into situations that don’t feel good, you are learning about your fears, confronting the personal demons that inhabit the furthest reaches of your mind, and exploring yourself. You will become a stronger warrior each time you do this.

7. Don’t Preach Dogma – As you gather skill and experience, you will also acquire a set of beliefs about how you have done things. This set of beliefs will color your perception of the world around you – especially if you choose to pass your teachings on to a new generation. Beware of an inflexible mind for it will put these beliefs in a rigid framework that is not open to discussion or evolution. Just because things worked one way for you does not mean they will work that way for everyone else. Each individual is just that – a individual. Life is as varied as each cell in our bodies and there will be no one path that is right for everyone. If you choose to teach, you must ensure that your own mind is not fixed on some ancient ideal or stubborn theory or romantic memory, but rather is always questing for new ways and methods that will help others, rather than simply reinforcing your egotistical assumptions of what is right.

8. Don’t Believe The Hype – You may be praised by others; you may be worshipped; you may gather about you a flock of followers who treasure everything you do and their time with you – all of this is incredibly dangerous. It’s subtle and addictive. And your ego will lap it up and greedily beg for more. Feed this beast and it will only become stronger and more demanding. Believe your own hype at grave peril, because it is surely not true. You may do great things; you may become heroic, but don’t ever fail to remember your own humble beginnings. Humility keeps you rooted in reality when ego wants to take you on a trip to the stars. Real warriors are mild-mannered and unassuming; they are quietly confident about what they are capable of and simultaneously not too proud to admit when they don’t have a clue. Beware those who seem to have an answer for everything, for surely they do not.

9. Help Others – Always. Warriors are protectors of the good and the just. They are keepers of the flow of positivity in the universe and challengers to the negative energy of evil. Warriors help those who are not yet strong enough to help themselves. They show the path that is possible and do so by leading by example. They serve as inspiration and through their actions show others what a human being is truly capable of. Generating positive energy is hard and demanding, which is why it is a precious resource. Generating negative energy is easy and takes little discipline or effort – negativity is the lazy person’s lifeline. Shun negativity and embrace positivity if you hope to help make the universe a better place. Let the way you lead your life be the example that will draw others to the path and lead them to the better place we are all capable of reaching if we try hard enough.

Sears: Total FAILURE – Part 2

Back at the end of October, I wrote a blog post detailing the absolute unmitigated FAILURE of Sears to make good on its delivery of three appliances to my home. While blasting this around Twitter and other social media networks, I heard back from the folks apparently manning the “SearsCares” Twitter account who repeatedly assured me they would have the case manager make it right.

Eventually, I did indeed speak with a new case manager named Eric, who was professional and polite and we eventually reached an agreement regarding fair compensation for the failure of the company to make good on its promises. I would be refunded a certain amount and the refund would be put back on the card I’d used to make the purchases initially. There was one hiccup in this – the credit card I used to buy the appliances was compromised and I had to get a new one issued to me. A few more days of wrangling ensued mostly because Sears’ policy is to only refund the card that was used. However, to their credit, they agreed to refund the amount to my new card. At this point, we’re now approaching Thanksgiving and I was assured by Eric that the refunds would go through within days of the holiday. Sears would process one refund a day (again, this is apparently their policy) and I would therefore get three separate refunds to my card.

That was over three weeks ago and to date, I have not received one single cent of my promised refund. I have emailed repeatedly and again taken to Twitter about how horribly Sears has failed in its consumer relationship with me. Once again, Christine over at “SearsCares” has promised to get a case manager to contact me about it. That was two days ago and STILL I have not gotten a phone call or a refund.

I have tried to be fair throughout this mess. I have tried to give them the benefit of the doubt and been more than patient with them.

No longer.

As of today, I am filing an official complaint with the State Attorney General’s office in Boston, as well as alerting the various members of the media I know personally, and again taking to the social media universe. Because of the total and complete failure that my Sears shopping experience has been, I would urge anyone with money to spend it elsewhere. Sears has proven time and time again that they do not appreciate their consumers, they do not live up to their promises, and they do not care about making things right.

Do NOT give them your business and warn others to steer clear of them as well. If Sears cannot honor its commitments, it does not deserve to be in business.

Please be sure to spread this around as warning to others NOT to make the mistake I made in buying from Sears. Thank you.

Why It’s Important to Subscribe to My Newsletter

My newsletter is one of the most important things I have as an author. It lets me keep all my readers informed of my new work, writing, happenings, and all sorts of assorted goodness. There’s free fiction and more in each issue and I try to make it a bit more interesting with each installment. 2013 will see some cool changes as well with more added content every month. I always recommend that people subscribe and stay subscribed and this morning presented a perfect reason why.

Starting in January, Instagram says it now has the right to sell your photographs. Go read the article and nuke your Instagram account and then come back and we’ll continue.

Back? Okay, so Instagram is owned by Facebook. They bought Instagram for billions of dollars and now they have a very popular photography site that they are planning on turning into a serious revenue stream for themselves. I don’t use Instagram (I think I did once, but I nuked my account this morning just to be sure) but I do use Facebook. A LOT. I post tons of things out there to both my personal profile and my fan page. And my thinking is that if Facebook enacts a stupid policy change like they just did with Instagram, then what’s to stop them from doing the same at Facebook itself? While they’ve repeatedly said they won’t charge anyone to use Facebook, will they attempt to sell things that people post as a revenue maker? It’s possible. is it likely? I don’t know.

But I do know that if they ever did, my Facebook presence would disappear in a second. And that’s why I’m urging you all to subscribe to my free newsletter now so we have a redundant system of communication between us. Yes, you can find me on Facebook and stay up-to-date, but what if Facebook goes down or I stop posting there? By being a member of the coolest newsletter subscriber base on the planet (if I do say so rather immodestly) you’ll be sure that you always get the latest and greatest from me.

A new issue is dropping in a few days, so don’t wait. Subscribe right now by plopping your email address into the little box below. It’s quick, easy, and totally free. I will never sell your information to anyone. Ever. Period.


Family Security

The news today out of Newtown, CT is horrible on so many levels. It’s hard to know how to even begin to fathom the evil that would rob innocent children of their lives. When my sons got out of school today, my wife and I were there to greet them, hug them, and then most importantly, sit down and talk about what happened.

I know a lot of parents think that shielding their children from atrocities like this are what they should do, but I happen to disagree. Children need to know that evil exists and it can strike anytime, any place, and it can happen to anyone. The better prepared they are, the better chance they have of surviving if (heaven forbid) they ever find themselves in a situation like what happened earlier today. Due to some personal messages I received after posting a status update to this effect, I have decided to elaborate on some ideas as a public service. I hope you find them helpful. These are things my wife and I discuss with our boys. You may want to do the same.

1. First, talk to them. Walk them through the tragedy so they understand. This is a delicate and difficult process. My wife and I were both tearing up as we talked with our sons today. But they should see that. Because they’re not parents, they don’t necessarily understand how much the thought of losing them hurts. Seeing your pain will help impress upon them how serious a matter this is. As you discuss the event, stop often and ask how they’re feeling and if they have questions. Kids need to know that evil exists – it’s not fearmongering or ruining their innocence; it’s better preparing them for the real world. Sadly, these are the times we live in. I’d rather have my children lose their innocence than lose their lives.

2. Teach them that their awareness is their single best defense. In today’s busy world, our kids often have their heads down or on other things aside from what’s happening around them. Because they may not yet be big enough to physically defend themselves, awareness is their best weapon. Practice exercises with them like asking them to recall what sort of car just drove by. What was the license plate of that car? What color sweater was that woman wearing on the train? Have them do the same to you. Make it a game, but at the same time make sure they understand how vital it is to be aware. Not sometimes. Not once in a while. But all the time.

3. Get them familiar with the sound of gunfire. Now before you all rush to your emails and send me nasty messages, hear me out. We live around the way from a gun club. The sound of gunfire is around us fairly constantly – especially on weekends. Each time we hear guns going off, we make sure the boys recognize it. We’ve driven them past the range so they can hear how loud it is up close and what it would sound like to be near a gun. What this does is prompt their subconscious to recognize gunfire and alert them if those sounds happen in a place where there shouldn’t be gunfire, i.e, a school or shopping plaza. Even an extra second or two is an advantage in a crisis situation.

4. Answer their questions honestly. If you don’t know the answer, tell them you will find out and get back to them, and then do it! We stressed that they should listen to their teachers today, but if they find themselves alone and unable to get back to the safety of their classroom or they are unable to flee to safety, that they should pretend it’s a game of hide-and-seek and they should try to find the best possible place to hide and then stay there until the police come.

5. Establish communication procedures. How will you get in contact with them and vice versa? Make sure they know that you will come for them and be able to communicate. My sons learned my cellphone number before they could say their address properly. Nowadays, they have multiple ways to get in touch with both my wife and me.

6. Make sure you prepare as a family. If you’re in a restaurant or movie theater, do you and your spouse have a plan for responding to a threat? My wife and I know exactly what our roles are in such an event. Evacuation of the kids and dealing with the threat are both parts of our plan. That may not be possible for you depending on whether you have training or not, but a clear evac route is necessary. Teach your kids to make a note of the exits whenever they enter a new place, restaurant, theater, etc.

These are just a few of the ways you can better prepare your children and your family for the possibility of a hostile event. I wish such things didn’t have to be discussed, but unfortunately, in today’s world they need to be.

I hope you’ll all join me in sending out thoughts, prayers, well-wishes, and positivity to those affected by this horrible tragedy. And please share this post if you think it will do some good.

Be well everyone.

Don’t Compare Yourself to Other Writers

Over the last seven/eight days, I wrote just shy of 70,000 words. The schedule and word count per day broke down like this:

  • Monday: 10,000
  • Tuesday: 12,500
  • Wednesday: 12,500
  • Thursday: 7500
  • Friday: 7500
  • Saturday: 5000
  • Sunday: 5000
  • Monday: 8500

For me, this was a good haul. I’m in first draft mode, which (as some of you may remember) is what I affectionately call my “puke it out” phase. This is where I don’t give a crap about the quality of what I write; I just want the basic storyline down so I can then go back and rewrite, edit, tweak, ad infinitum until I’m satisfied with the quality of it. My method for writing during this phase looks pretty much like this:

  • Each chapter is roughly 2,000-2,500 words.
  • It takes me approximately one hour to write each chapter (sometimes less, sometimes more)
  • After each chapter, I take a nice break (Facebook, exercise, talk to friends, whatever)
  • Repeat

Depending on my pace and how fast the ideas are rolling, it’s possible that I will top out around 16,000 words each day – which is my personal best. More often, my comfortable daily range is 10,000-12,500 thereabouts. That’s comparable to the time a lot of people spend working each day in an office. By and large, this daily rate is unsustainable for much more than a week. And if I wrote like that each day, every day, I’d burn out in no time. But when everything is firing on all cylinders, yes, this is the rate I can churn out words at.

And you know what? Big deal.

Seriously. Big fucking deal.

Should you be impressed? I don’t know. I don’t much care. I don’t post word counts to brag or gloat. I post them because it’s a good day’s work FOR ME and I’m satisfied with what I accomplished. And therein lies the rub: as you progress as a writer, you will inevitably find a system that works for you. I discovered mine writing eleven installments of the Rogue Angel series for Harlequin’s Gold Eagle imprint. I had seriously short deadlines and as a result, found that I work very well doing first drafts in very little time. It’s intense and requires a lot of Twix candy bars and Pepsi, but it works for me quite well. So that’s how I write first drafts these days.

Last night I posted about sending off the first book in the Shadow Warrior series to my editor at Baen Books (while I’d been working on the first draft of this new novel, I’d also been editing Shadow Warrior.) and combined with the fact that I finished the first draft, I was enjoying basking in the afterglow of a job well done. A friend of mine reposted about me writing 70k words in 7 days on her status and that then opened up the floodgates of nonsense:

So here you’ve got a whole group of supposedly professional writers taking issue with what I’ve accomplished. Sarah Pinborough wins the award for “So Obvious, It’s Too Stupid To Post It But I Will Anyway” comment. Suw Charman-Anderson thinks that it takes some insane amount of pre-planning before anyone is capable of doing what I did. (In reality I worked from 3-page synopsis). Vincent Holland-Keen arrives on-scene to gladhand himself about how awesome he is for not writing as fast. Later on this same tosser brings up my character Jake Thunder (obviously without seeing the bit about Jake’s Native American past) and then claims he’s not judging, when in reality, he’s doing exactly that – equating hardboiled PI genre work as being lowbrow. Steve Mosby offers up his assessment that all I really did was “type” and later on agrees that my level of output is “misleading” because I might have spent months planning it out. Keith Walters offers up his assertion that he feels his quality is better when he writes 1500 words as opposed to anything more. Tom Wood trots out the belief that by me working so hard, I must have no time for anything else – he should probably take a gander at my biography and then spend a day with me doing everything I do (on second thought, he’d probably tap out before we even got to breakfast) prior to imagining me as some recluse without a life.

THANKFULLY, James Oswald shows up with a bit of reason.

The rest of that is pretty pathetic – a bunch of supposedly professional writers calling my work into question because they compared themselves to what I do. Had I posted a status update along these lines: “Yeah, just cranked 70,000 words in one week. What’s up other bitch writers? You guys suck for not being able to match my pace. Slackers. Doesn’t anyone have the power to go toe-to-toe with me?” then their little bitchfest would have been understandable.

But I don’t do that. I don’t compare myself to other writers. As far as I’m concerned, the only person I’m competing against is myself. Did I write this book better than the last? Did it take me longer to do so? Will this one sell better than the last book I wrote? Can I tell the story even better the next time? That’s what matters. Not what some other writer is doing. I don’t care what other writers do in the course of their work. If they’re bringing out one book a year – good for them. If they manage ten books a year – good for them. All I care about is what I do.

And all you should care about is what YOU do. When you write, there’s no one else involved. So why should it matter how other writers do their work?

It shouldn’t.

But writers tend, by and large, to have massive insecurities and massive egos. They like to think their way is the best and everyone else sucks anyway. This is why writers invent awards that no one has ever heard of, let alone cares about. This is why you get little bitchfests like the above. A lot of writers cut down other writers – and especially aspiring writers – because it makes them feel better about their place in the mud puddle. But none of that matters.

Time was, there used to be only so many books published each year, only so many editors, only so many contracts. Competition was tough. Nowadays, anyone can write and publish. Unfortunately, that makes the old “pros” mad. It upsets them that people didn’t have to slog it out in the trenches and accumulate tons of rejections. To most of these veteran writers, the new upstarts represent a direct threat to their livelihood.

That’s ridiculous, short-sighted, and frankly, stupid. But there you go.

When you make the decision to write, do it for yourself. Find your own path. Find what works for you. Don’t waste your time henpecking the techniques of other writers; they ain’t you. I can’t stand outlining, but I know writers who swear by it and it works for them. Awesome. I know writers who can churn out double the words I just did and do so consistently. Awesome. I know writers who can only manage 1,000 words each week. Awesome.

At the end of the day, what you accomplish is up to you – it’s not up to the whims of someone else. If you want to get something done, do it. Whining about quality or quantity or any of the other idiocy exhibited in the screencap above is wasted time.

Listen to your gut and do what works for you.